Rethinking Love with bell hooks and Erich Fromm
Valentine’s Day is right around the corner, and while many of us are knee-deep in heart-shaped sweets and last-minute gift shopping, it’s a great time to ask—what does love really mean? Two influential voices in the conversation about love are bell hooks and Erich Fromm, each offering unique insights that challenge us to dig deeper. Their books, "All About Love: New Visions" and "The Art of Loving," provide a refreshing take that goes beyond the traditional romance narrative.
bell hooks reminds us, "Love is a combination of care, commitment, knowledge, responsibility, respect, and trust." In "All About Love," she calls for a broader perspective on love as an active practice rather than a mere feeling. Her focus is on love as a choice—a disciplined action that transcends mere romantic gestures. This is particularly relevant in our fast-paced, often superficial modern world, where love is frequently reduced to fleeting moments.
On the flip side, Erich Fromm, in his classic "The Art of Loving," posits that love is an art that requires knowledge and effort. He famously said, "Love is not just a feeling; it is a decision." Fromm encourages readers to view love as a skill that can be developed, emphasizing responsibility and care as fundamental components. This perspective resonates strongly in today's context, where meaningful connections often seem hard to come by.
When we put hooks and Fromm side by side, we find that both thinkers stress responsibility, commitment, and understanding as core tenets of love. However, hooks places more emphasis on the societal structures that shape our experiences of love, while Fromm focuses on the individual’s capacity to cultivate it. Taken together, these thoughtful explorations of love can be eye-opening & life changing.
As we celebrate love in its many forms, let’s take a cue from hooks and Fromm to engage more deeply with those we care about. Here’s to thoughtful connections and a love that enriches our lives—not just on February 14th, but every day of the year!
Be well,
Bev
P.S. These insights could make great gifts for that special someone—or even a treat for yourself! Happy Valentine’s Day!